By Marguerite Sechehaye, Grace Rubin-Rabson, Frank Conroy
The narrator of this booklet is called Renee. Her final identify isn't printed, nor are many different conditions of her existence. what's printed, despite the fact that, is way more odd, way more amazing. In ideal, nearly painfully vibrant language, Renee has printed her trip into the depths of schizophrenia, and her step by step go back to sanity. In doing so, she has created a human record with out peer within the literature of insanity.
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Extra resources for Autobiography of a Schizophrenic Girl
I was glad that Mama changed her method at the end of the first year of analysis. In the beginning, she analyzed everything I said, my fear, my guilt. These investigations seemed to me like a bill of complaints, quite as though in looking for the cause of feelings, trying to change it. people, or the objects for the I they became more at fault and more real. " This for me was proof that if the guilt existed, that the System was really there since one could find the reason for its actions. From these sessions I went home more unhappy, more blameworthy, more than ever, without any contact, isolated alone in But my own unreal world.
Over and above the vastness reigned a terrifying quiet, broken glittering like a needle, less by noises making the silence still more quiet and terrifying. And I— I was lost with my friend in the limitless space. But is it really she, this woman who is speaking, gesticulating? I see her shining white teeth, her brown eyes looking at me. And I perceive a statue by my side, a puppet, part of the pasteboard scenery. What fear, what anguish! " My friend has not understood the question. I keep quiet, more alone and isolated than ever.
I attempted to escape their hold by calling out their names. " But the word echoed hollowly, deprived of all meaning; it had left the object, was divorced from it, so much so that on one hand it was a living, mocking thing, on the other, a name, robbed of sense, an envelope emptied of content. Nor was I able to bring the two together, but stood rooted there before them, filled with fear and impotence. " And they, the doctors, too, thought I saw these things as humans whom I heard speak. But it was not that.